Love or Confusion?

Why is it when we think we are saved, we find that we are really just damned.

I've hurt myself by hating you...

but how could I hate such a beautiful soul.. what was I thinking...

Do you look down and know my true feelings.... I wasn't really mad at you

I've missed you so much.. why can someone go that is needed so badly

I guess we really don't know what is important until it is no longer with us,

I'm sorry... for hurting you.

it seems it like it was just yesterday when i walked away...

I want to hold you, and take your pain away, there is nothing I wouldn't do to take your pain away.

But when I call there is no answer, you have gone away.. left me to myself

the guilt is rotton...

seems like yesterday the last time I heard "I love you sister boo" if I only knew... But I walked away...

I just want to hold you in my arms and cradle you pain away.. there is nothing I wouldn't do to hear you precious voice again.

I just want to run and hide when you take me like this... Why does she do the same... why does my pride let this happen again.
When she goes I will have another on my mind, there is no glory in this.


My brother is gone, and soon my sister will follow

Every time I think everything is going O.K. Something has to remind me that it isn't.

I had quite the interesting conversation yesterday with a girl I have newly became friends with. Finding out that you share more than the love of beer, can be a little hard to swallow. But I put the big girl panties on, and pushed through. Hearing more than I ever wanted to. Saying more than I ever wanted to, and feeling more weird than I ever wanted to.

John's birthday just passed. Such a sad day.

Tomorrow is the 10 year anniversary of the accident. I can't believe that 10 years have passed. So much has changed, yet so much has stayed the same. I suppose it would depend on who you ask, what answer you get.
I have to say all in all, that life has been good to me.. there are people who have it bad. I sometimes complain and think my life sucks, but everything that is bad are things that I can change. Just have to grow the balls to do it.
So I am not going to complain anymore, I am just working my ass off to change the things I don't like. and as long as I still have the ability to change those things, I am in pretty good shape.
peace
homies.